Genre : Romantic Comedy
A lily white Irish kid from Hoboken pursues his dream to grow up and become a Mafia hitman.
Peddling garish coffee tables in Kelly green tights and elfin magic shoes may seem like an honest living, but it’s hardly the boyhood dream Ol’ Blue Eyes himself delivered to eight year old Josh McClanahan that fateful day in Hoboken along with his missing mutt Max and the realization that the only cool was “Mafia” cool.
Fast forward twenty five years and Josh realizes “if not now, then when?” He deep sixes the tights in favor of a double breasted kingpin pinstripe and a fedora to boot and sets his sights on the role of hitman extraordinaire. Just one problem; red hair and transparent Irish skin scream anything but Italian even in the darkness of the underground.
In search of his chance to prove his worthiness as a thug to be reckoned with, Josh goes in search of his first assignment and stumbles on a bodacious babe with a little problem; a bullheaded, baying Bassett named Bently. With the promise to see that her barricade to beauty sleep disappears, Josh puts his self-manufactured mafia instincts to work and sets out to send Bently to hound heaven. Just one thing lacking in our lost leprechaun; the killer instinct.
Finding himself a failure as a fugitive, Josh hunts down a new home for Bently at Heather’s Haven, the ultimate bed and breakfast for down trodden doggies and other battered beasts. Josh barely gets past the threshold of Heather’s before he realizes he’s been bitten. Beautiful Heather quickly turns Josh into a prisoner to her every charm.
Upon discovering the one sure way to see Heather is to bring her any and all four legged forlorn, Josh scours the city and scoops up the outcasts to serve as his “in”. What he doesn’t know, is Mike Marinella, a mafia wanna-be with the clear advantage of Italian features and unmistakable Italian name, is waiting in the wings to collect the critters from Heather and turn them into his very own canine cartel. His mission? Track mafia drug lords and their attempts to smuggle smack into the U.S. and head them off at point of entry. So, it’s Mike and his unsuspecting gaggle of four legged gangsters who serve as the welcome committee at the international terminal at JFK, their goal to bag baggage with street value in the millions before his band of bruiser mafia brothers knows what hit them.
When the romance resistant Heather begins to fall for Josh, something like love is in the air until she discovers he’s risked her furry friends and sent them snout first into the jaws of Mike and his unscrupulous ways. Josh quickly realizes he must recover the missing mutts and offer up his heart to Heather in what he hopes is an offer she can’t refuse.
Can Josh locate the pooches in peril and deliver the doggie goods to their rightful owner in perfect Sinatra style? Or has Mike turned the “every-Fido” into a hopeless fugitive destined for a dog-gone shameful life of disorganized crime?
by Cicely Wynne
Genre: Romantic Comedy
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